On the verge

Do you ever have a feeling that you're at a point where your life might diverge into a way that you hadn't yet imagined?  Cause I'm feeling that way right now.  I feel apprehensive and excited, but also a little scared.  It's easy to feel brave when life looks like how you're planning it... but these surprises can pop out from anywhere!

It's interesting, because if you believe in the mysteries of quantum physics, then you have to consider the possibility that our infinite universe, always expanding, contains different worlds where these small little divergences occur.  It's like this tree, where there's all these root systems, but the history goes back to one single trunk of the universe coming into existence.  Sometimes I can sit in a chair and ponder this for hours.

The problem with thinking about these divergences?  As I'm recognizing these different opportunities, I need to give serious thought to how I want my future to look.  It's like the quote from Alice in Wonderland (one of my favorite quotes in literature, in fact):
"Would you tell me please, which way I go from here?" asked Alice.
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to." Said the Cat.

So, where do I want to get to?  I'm not sure.  I'm doing a lot of thinking , and I think I need to call my mom.  She brought me into this world, I think talking to her might help me better determine where I want to go.

A further note, specifically about running...

For the past few years, ever since I began running I guess, I've experienced excruciating hip pain that would flare up for no discernible rhyme or reason. With my Pilates instructor training on the horizon, I wanted to get the go-ahead from professionals to pursue this goal, and I wanted to have a diagnosis for the pain so that I could understand what to do to prevent or mitigate the flares.

What I learned: I have ITBS, but occurring at my hips, rather than at my knees (which is where most runners experience it). This is great news! I have some strengthening exercises that I now do a couple of times each week, and I'm getting ready to inject slow but steady increases in my mileage/time spent running each week. My Pilates training will almost certainly be a boon to my body, helping to get my muscles working together better, and helping to stave off the pain.

I was almost a bit too optimistic when I began fantasizing about my return to running though-- I was trying to plot out marathon training so that I could run a marathon on my next birthday (in a few months). But looking at the amount of training, I recognized that (1) it was far too ambitious than would probably be good for my hips, and (2) I don't know how I would fit so much time/mileage into each week -- I've got a lot on my plate as it is. So, the good thing? I do think that I could comfortably manage a half-marathon. One of my best friends is in training for an earlier half, and I'm feeling inspired by her to really challenge myself to train for the distance. I can see how her hard work is paying off, and I admire that. Plus since the actual race will be on my birthday, I will walk when I want to and not feel pressured for any grand showing. Cause that'll make it fun for me!

I may do some writing on my Sasha in Seattle blog for a few, but then I think I need to dive into a spreadsheet with my calendar at hand, and really figure the next 12 weeks out! Hurrah!

Running and writing.

Yesterday, I browsed through my various blogs. And I realized it's been a long time since I've written in this blog, and so I got to thinking about why I hadn't written in here.

I think I know why. I started this blog with the intention to document my road trip plan (you can replace "plan" with "fantasy") of two years ago. But I think that really I should have looked at the "write or run" portion of this blog's address. Writing and running both bring me great pleasure, and I know that things are going well when I have enough time to feed those pleasures. However, I think I find it hard to make time for both, and therefore it's hard to get enough of either one.

Basically... what I'm saying is that I need to channel this blog back onto the things that bring me pleasure in life, and in that way I'll document the metaphorical road trip of life that I am on. I'm getting to a point in life where I am feeling closer to balancing out the work-play factor, especially as I'm striving to find ways to make work feel like play. I do hope that my parents will know how grateful I am that they introduced me to Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle's Magic.